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Saturday, 14 April 2012 - After cocaine binge, Bill Clegg writes of recovery |
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      Edition: U.S. Africa Arabic Argentina Brazil Canada China France Germany India Italy Japan Latin America Mexico Russia Spain United Kingdom Home Business Business Home Economy Technology Media Small Business Legal Deals Earnings Social Pulse Business Video The Freeland File Markets Markets Home U.S. Markets European Markets Asian Markets Global Market Data Indices M&A Stocks Bonds Currencies Commodities Futures Funds peHUB World World Home U.S. Brazil China Euro Zone Japan Mexico Russia India Insight World Video Reuters Investigates Decoder Politics Politics Home Election 2012 Issues 2012 Candidates 2012 Tales from the Trail Political Punchlines Supreme Court Politics Video Tech Technology Home MediaFile Science Tech Video Tech Tonic Social Pulse Opinion Opinion Home Chrystia Freeland John Lloyd Felix Salmon Jack Shafer David Rohde Bernd Debusmann Nader Mousavizadeh Lucy P. 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See the best of Reuters photography.  See more  Inside North Korea Rare scenes from within the reclusive state.  Slideshow  Refugee art Drawings on the canvas of tents in Syrian refugee camps on the Turkish-Syrian border.  Slideshow  After cocaine binge, Bill Clegg writes of recovery Tweet Share this Email Print Analysis & Opinion If Apple, publishers plotted they didn’t need to Related Topics Entertainment » Fashion » People » 1 of 2. Author Bill Clegg is pictured in this undated handout photo received by Reuters April 13, 2012. Clegg's new memoir begins where his first book left off, with a new goal of ninety days. Credit: Reuters/Christian Hansen/Handout By Christine Kearney NEW YORK | Fri Apr 13, 2012 4:37pm EDT NEW YORK (Reuters) - New York literary agent Bill Clegg's first memoir counted down two months spent blowing $70,000 on a binge of crack cocaine and male escorts in New York's boutique hotels while avoiding loved ones and the publishing agency he built and owned. His newest book begins where the first left off with a new goal of 90 days. But this time around, Clegg is not out to kill himself with endless sleep-deprived, paranoid nights on cocaine. Instead, it's an account of getting sober and a journey of relapse and recovery. "Ninety Days," released in the United States this week, is Clegg's second - and last, he promises - truth tale following 2010's "Portrait of an Addict as a Young Man." That book shocked the New York media world, pleased critics, and enamored readers with Clegg's wrenching, honest style and the tragedy of his rise and fall. Rather than cashing in on his first book's sweeping success, Clegg, now 41, told Reuters in an interview he didn't feel he had any choice but to head straight into the next personal offering of his struggle with addiction. "I just didn't have a finished feeling," he said, recalling how he kept on writing even before his first book was published and without knowing how that would be received. But now, after "Ninety Days," "the well is dry," said Clegg. "It was the last drop of writing in me." His new memoir begins with Clegg returning from a rehabilitation clinic to New York City, the tempting den of his many dances with drugs and alcohol. In an effort to stay sober, he joins an addicts support group, finds a sponsor, and begins a roller coaster ride to beating his habit. Clegg doesn't compare "Ninety Days", which like his first memoir replaces some real names with pseudonyms, to the many recovery memoirs that have come before him, nor does he pretend to be an expert on addiction. It's simply his personal journey. "I felt like for a long time I was the only one who ever tried to get sober but couldn't," he said. "And I would look around the rooms and I would see people getting sober and I just thought 'Wow, I am really the one person who can't get this.'" Unlike his first book, which the reader spends mostly inside Clegg's paranoid mind following his harrowing descent as he is convinced he is being trailed by counter-narcotics agents, the second one explores the lives of several of recovering addicts around him - a community he feels indebted to. "The truth is that, in my experience with other alcoholics and addicts, the story of recovery and the story of active addiction is very common. The experiences, the challenges, the feelings we have are so predictable in a funny way," he said. RETURN FROM COCAINE ABYSS The book follows Clegg's climb back from having no home, little money and no job back to being hired as literary agent at William Morris, where he remains to this day representing such high-profile names as Diane Keaton, Anjelica Huston and authors such as Lauren Groff and Nick Flynn. Since "Portrait", letters of support have come from a range of readers, former addicts to New Yorkers carving out successful careers who relate to Clegg's painful journey of presenting one image to the world versus the lonely and desperate person he was inside. Clegg's own theory on his former dual personalities is that many successful people are often over compensating for insecurities. "Their compensation for that insecurity sort of begets success," he said. "The more success they get, the greater distance there is from this outside perception and inside reality." In getting sober Clegg learned "the distance between that external and internal reality. The distance gets bridged and eventually there is an alignment to 'what you see is what you get'. And I am not hiding some secret truth behind this seemingly comfortable confidence, which is a facade." He isn't aware if people ever discarded him in his professional or personal life due to his admissions, but if so, he deals with it in the even manner of many former addicts who have already faced their worst fears. "If you are not comfortable having somebody who has been an active crack addict, an alcoholic, in your life, that is OK," he said. "That's a private decision." And he knocks wood when he now describes himself as "happy," after spending so long in drug-induced distress. "I was only ever able to change my ways and grow solely and painfully toward this happy life that I love right now through great pain. It took losing almost everything in my life to get me to get sober," he said. As for whether he feels he will ever return to the seeming secret thrill of those dark days, Clegg says that unbeknown to most, recovery was the best high he has ever had. "That first burst of sobriety which people in recovery often describe as pink cloud - I have never felt so exhilarated in my life," he said. (Editing by Bob Tourtellotte) Entertainment Fashion People Tweet this Link this Share this Digg this Email Reprints   We welcome comments that advance the story through relevant opinion, anecdotes, links and data. If you see a comment that you believe is irrelevant or inappropriate, you can flag it to our editors by using the report abuse links. Views expressed in the comments do not represent those of Reuters. For more information on our comment policy, see http://blogs.reuters.com/fulldisclosure/2010/09/27/toward-a-more-thoughtful-conversation-on-stories/ Comments (0) Be the first to comment on reuters.com. Add yours using the box above.   Edition: U.S. Africa Arabic Argentina Brazil Canada China France Germany India Italy Japan Latin America Mexico Russia Spain United Kingdom Back to top Reuters.com Business Markets World Politics Technology Opinion Money Pictures Videos Site Index Legal Bankruptcy Law California Legal New York Legal Securities Law Support & Contact Support Corrections Connect with Reuters Twitter   Facebook   LinkedIn   RSS   Podcast   Newsletters   Mobile About Privacy Policy Terms of Use AdChoices Copyright Our Flagship financial information platform incorporating Reuters Insider An ultra-low latency infrastructure for electronic trading and data distribution A connected approach to governance, risk and compliance Our next generation legal research platform Our global tax workstation Thomsonreuters.com About Thomson Reuters Investor Relations Careers Contact Us   Thomson Reuters is the world's largest international multimedia news agency, providing investing news, world news, business news, technology news, headline news, small business news, news alerts, personal finance, stock market, and mutual funds information available on Reuters.com, video, mobile, and interactive television platforms. Thomson Reuters journalists are subject to an Editorial Handbook which requires fair presentation and disclosure of relevant interests. NYSE and AMEX quotes delayed by at least 20 minutes. Nasdaq delayed by at least 15 minutes. For a complete list of exchanges and delays, please click here.

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